Terry Storch

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Love and Respect

A profound mystery...I often think about that scripture verse a little out of context. I often think my wife, and even women in general are a profound mystery. I don’t really understand them, or get how things work in their minds. I am sorta joking, but in many ways I am not, men and women are SO different. 

Paul reminds us the Christian marriage is a profound mystery. 

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery...” - ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5:31-32‬a ‭NIV‬‬

We are one flesh, united in Christ Jesus. Paul went old school here, he pulled out the Torah, which would be very easy for him since he would of had much if not all memorized. 

“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” - ‭‭Genesis‬ ‭2:24‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Throughout Pauls writings, and other writers we read to honor God with our Body’s. We hear that our body are temples of the Holy Spirit. That the Spirt of the Lord dwells in our body. 

“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.” - ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭6:19-20‬ ‭NIV‬‬

I get why Paul was reminding the Ephesians that this is a mystery. Our physical bodies are more than just flesh, bone and blood. We are a spiritual being, the Spirit of the Lord dwells in each of us, and as a Christian husband I am also one with my wife, and we are united as one in Christ. 

I am just going to focus on my part to play, so men pay attention. 

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” - ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5:25-28‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Whoa...this is a high bar, and standard! This is a unique type of love, well beyond gifts, taking out the trash, and mowing the lawn. This is a sacrificial kind of love. Pastor Kris unpacks this kind of love and breaks it down for us. 

There are four words in Greek that all get translated as love in English, but they’re different. The first three are brotherly love (or affection), romantic love (or passion), and contented (or steadfast) love. A husband should have all of those for his wife. But the fourth one, the one here, is agape. It is sacrifice. Die to self.

Love = affection, passion, steadfast and sacrifice. Four parts to love, and my guess would be husbands you often think about the first two, maybe the third every now and again. But we must bring in the fourth, agape love and recognize that two becoming one requires and demands us to sacrifice, to die to self. This is the greatest call of servant hood. We should not be limited in our service to just our gifts, we need to bring all we have...but I think we need to start by leveraging the gifts that God has put in us, and operate out of our gift mix.

“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.” - ‭‭1 Peter‬ ‭4:10-11‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Husbands, serve your wife’s. Husbands, lay down your selfish ambition and put her needs and desires above yours. Agape love is our calling as a Christian husband. Guys, I understand that you needed and require respect. My guess is, if you love your wife with agape love, with a sacrificial, die to self love - respect will be a natural response from her. Don’t hold your love until you are respected, that is not agape. 

Love and Respect. Men, love [agape] your wives! Women, you are a profound mystery to us...but we really desire and need your respect.


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